Greygender

Greygender or graygender is a gender identity in which one's gender is completely or partially outside the gender binary, and one has a strong ambivalence about their gender identity or gender expression. They feel they have (a) gender(s), as well as a natural inclination or desire to express them, but it’s weak and/or somewhat indeterminate; they don’t feel it constantly, or they’re not invested in it. One will know they have partial gender(s)/expression, but they are not fully connected/disconnected from it.

Common Definitions

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Graygender / Greygender:

a person who identifies as (at least partially) outside the gender binary and has a strong natural ambivalence about their gender identity or gender expression. They feel they have a gender(s), as well as a natural inclination or desire to express it, but it’s weak and/or somewhat indeterminate/indefinable, or they don’t feel it most of the time, or they’re just not that invested in it. They’re not entirely without a gender or gender expression, but they’re not entirely “with” it either, so to speak.

So using the word “graygender” can express: the state of being kinda close to agender but not quite (just greysexuality is kinda close to asexuality but not quite), having a nonbinary gender that falls in a hazy grey area and can be hard to define or pinpoint, being gender neutral-ish more because of ambivalence and lack of participation in gender rather than active participation in nonbinary gender expression, and/or feeling gender and an inclination to participate in gendered thinking/expression less than most seem to.

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–Invernom, 2014^[1]

“	Graygender or Gray Agender: is a term that describes a nonbinary gender that is weak and/or indeterminate or that the individual themself is not that invested in their gender.	”
–Pride-Flags, 2015^[2]

“	Graygender A gender term that describes someone who experiences ambivalence about gender identity or expression, and doesn’t fully identify with a binary gender that’s exclusively man or woman.	”
–Mere Abrams, LCSW and Sian Ferguson, 2022^[3]